The Rude Parrot:
A man walks into a pet store and sees a beautiful parrot, but the owner warns him:
— I’m letting you get it cheap because it has a dirty mouth. It lived in a brothel and says a lot of bad words.
The man buys it, takes it home, and puts it in its cage.
The parrot looks around and says:
— New house, new brothel!
The man’s daughters come in to see the parrot, and the animal blurts out:
— New girls, new staff!
The man’s wife comes into the room, and the parrot yells:
— Ohhh, the madam’s still the same!
When the man comes home from work, the parrot looks at him, opens his eyes in surprise, and says:
— Regular customer! Welcome back, sir!
The Old Man at the Pharmacy:
An old man walks into the pharmacy and says to the pharmacist:
— Give me 100 condoms, please.
The pharmacist, surprised, asks:
— Wow, sir! Why do you need so many?
The old man replies with a smile:
— My grandchildren are coming this weekend and they asked me to make them colorful balloons.
The Genie and the Three Wishes:
A man walks along the beach and finds a magic lamp. He rubs it, and a genie appears:
— I’ll grant you three wishes, but on one condition: whatever you ask for, your mother-in-law will receive double.
The man thinks and says:
1️⃣ I want one million dollars. 💰💰
— Granted, but your mother-in-law gets two million.
2️⃣ I want a huge mansion. 🏠
— Granted, but your mother-in-law gets two mansions.
3️⃣ I want to be beaten half to death! 👊😂
The Father, the Son, and the Forbidden Movie:
A father enters his son’s room and finds him watching an adult movie.
The son, embarrassed, immediately turns off the TV.
The father sits beside him and says with a smile:
“Relax, son, it’s normal to be curious about these things.”
The son sighs with relief.
Then the father adds:
“But if you look closely… in that scene, I’m the one in the background.”
The Man Who Lost His Memory:
A man wakes up in the hospital with a severe headache. The nurse approaches him and says:
“Sir, you had an accident and lost your memory.”
The man, confused, asks:
“What? I don’t remember anything?”
“That’s right.”
“Not even my wife?”
“No… but she’ll come visit you in a little while.”
The man pauses for thought and says:
—Tell me the truth, nurse… is this a blessing or a curse?